I was reading this post about stress and now I need to go make some chamomile tea and draw myself a hot bath.
The post is by Dr. Mark Hyman, a family physician and leading functional medicine expert. He says that stress is the main factor in many of the dysfunctions of chronic illness.
Stress raises cortisol, which in turn causes muscle loss, high blood pressure and high blood sugar. It also produces adrenaline, which makes you feel tense and nervous — which causes you to fire up your Rad Power bike and head straight to the DABC to purchase a case of that Old Town Cellars Townie Rosé even though it’s a little more expensive than the other rosés, but what the hell, it makes you feel good because you’re shopping small, not to mention helping out a local business that recently suffered a major flood from a burst city pipe.
From there, stress is just one long, anxiety-ridden slide to memory loss, diabetes, dementia. Not to mention wine belly.
You think now might be a good time to roll out that yoga mat, the one that’s been coiled in the corner of your bedroom like a hot-pink Hostess Ho-Ho for the past five months while you jacked up your back skiing anvil-shaped moguls in between storm cycles.
But hold on, Debbie Downward Dog. According to Dr. Hyman, stress is one of the most common causes of adrenal dysfunction which can ultimately make it hard to fall asleep at night. Bad sleep is bad.
Try telling that to your brain at 3 in the morning when you’re wide awake ordering an emerald-green tennis skirt just in case you finally decide to give in to all that peer pressure to play pickleball this summer.
Poor sleep habits not only damage your metabolism, says Dr. Hyman, but they also spike sugar and carb cravings, so you eat more and increase your risk for numerous diseases. Not even a cross-court dink into your opponent’s kitchen can save you now.
Major buzzkill to that box of frosted marshmallow funfetti donuts you picked up when you were hangry because you forgot the Pig Pen Saloon doesn’t serve Buffalo chicken nachos until after 3 p.m. — no exceptions — and it was 1 p.m. and you didn’t feel like waiting. So instead you drove all the way to the Kamas Chevron and all they had left was birthday donuts and it wasn’t even your birthday.
But not all stress is bad, right? I mean, look at the Navy Seals. Those guys have to do things like somersault into a pool, swim underwater 15 yards, then tie a becket bend, bowline, clove hitch, right angle and square knot — all without breaking the surface of the water. It might not be in any thesaurus, but stress has a lot in common with resilience. It’s how we adapt to difficult situations.
When the going gets tough, the tough tie knots in a Speedo.
Left unchecked for long periods of time, Dr. Hyman says, stress will also cause light sensitivity, caffeine dependency and brain fog.
Grabbing your Jackie-Os, you decide to take the dog for a walk on the rail trail, maybe stop at Ritual Coffee. On the way out, you accidentally lock the door without taking the key. No big whoop; you have a spare hidden in the garage — but then you realize you don’t have your iPhone so you grab the spare, go back inside and start wildly searching the house. Suddenly, your coat pocket starts vibrating and you fish out your iPhone and see a calendar reminder that you have a video conference starting in five minutes. The dog is still chilling in his leash when you finally finish the call 45 minutes later.
But it’s not all Zoom, doom and gloom. Dr. Hyman says that being outside is one of the best ways to reduce stress. In fact, studies show being in nature lowers stress while decreasing your heart rate. It boosts your mood. And it may even cause gloating. After all, you live in one of the world’s best towns for access to the great outdoors. Maybe it’s even why you moved here in the first place.
You think of your friend from Park City who’s outside in a big way: solo-hiking the Camino de Santiago in Spain. You send her a text to check in. She replies with a video of a large bull slowly ambling toward her on the trail, sounding enough cowbell to make even Christopher Walken back off.
“Will they hurt me?” she asks, the animal’s 12-inch horns now clearly in view as the bull begins to pick up the pace. My friend backs quickly off the trail, loudly pleading “What do you want?” She then gives the slightest little laugh, which may have infused the perfect moment of calm into an otherwise fear-the-reaper moment of fight or flight.
The bull gives her a heavy dose of side-eye as he casually continues down the path.
Sometimes, you’re the hiker. Sometimes, you’re the bull. And sometimes, a healthy burst of stress is just what you need.